Sweet Dreams

I had the most bittersweet dream last night.  I dreamed that my mom and aunt still owned the Mercer house.  I was up there visiting for some reason, and they were working on it, cleaning it, taking things out.  I walked through the rooms and ended up in my old corner room.  Most of my stuff was still there.  My old bed, my closet, even my computer desk.  I opened the doors of the desk and saw all my old games and videos.  In the house, there was a big window between my room and the dining room(that I often used to traverse between the two), and my mom saw me through the window. 

At this point, I think I was crying, because that room was so special to me and held so many good memories, even though I was there for only a year or so. It was the year that I came out of my shell, so to speak.  I was confident, I was outgoing, I was friendly, I was fearless.  I talked to anyone.  I talked to girls, pretty girls even, with no fear.  I made friends in every social circle.  I ran Star Wars games that were so much fun.  I joined the Speech and Debate team.  I had friends over and we played Perfect Dark for hours and hours.  I stayed up till the wee hours on Friday nights, reading Stephen Baxter books and listening to the hardcore show on RadioU.  And, I wrote a lot.  All in all, it was a treasured time for me.

The rest of my family, my brother and two sisters, ended up in the room and we reminisced for quite some time.  I then told Mom that she couldn’t sell the house, that I would buy it.  I wanted that house so badly.  It was still in such good shape, clean walls, clean carpet, bright lights, just an open, beautiful house.  Big backyard with a tiny creek.  Such a wonderful, lovely house that would be mine, surrounded by all those memories.

Then I woke up and remembered that it was sold long ago and the last time I saw it, it was gross and falling apart.